Catching up with friends after a long period of absence recently, was with an ex-colleague who's leaving for Austria for three months on a trial relationship with her 9-year pen-pal this Thursday. She'd been going through months of weighing the idea of moving over and finally she's giving it a shot. And mine's just a case of trailing a phase behind her, still undecided. She's 33. I'm 27.

We've both found ourselves tired and worn out of the industry we work in. How much of our lives its taken from us, and how we're sick of having to put our own personal lives on hold for work. Call it our biological clocks ticking, or just being hit with a sense of reality, but work will never marry us - no matter what our commitments are. So what's the next phase?

It must be a natural course of human lives, to suddenly want what we once refused. When our career was a priority to relationships, so we worked to achieve the best that we can, building a life for ourselves and creating our own comfort zones. But why is it most the time its the woman who needs to sacrifice that comfort zone? Gee, that didn't come out right. I just made it sound like a feminist argument. But really, almost all the women around me seem to be trading in their lives to be with someone. Or so that they won't be alone for the rest of their lives.

My ex-colleague is giving Austria a shot, and even brushing up on her German reading children's books. And another girlfriend was planning on moving to Australia with her boyfriend of 8-years who just got an expat job offer there. Maybe it's just a case of knowing more women uprooting than men. *shrug*

No matter how much support we can surround ourselves with, at the end of the day, only we can make the choices for ourselves. And when I thought I was ready, something comes along and challenges that idea.

My friends seem to be unconvinced I'm undecided though. I've already had two friends tell me that I might beat them to the altar. Really, this isn't a race. There's still so much I need to know to decide. And it's daunting.

p.s. This is written by my best friend FiG, who've been listening through my mental tortures the last week. He's been in Wellington for almost 2 years already, after a long wait for his PR. It's affirming and inspiring to know that someone else's patience and struggles does pay off.